Photos © Jamie Longmuir 2007

TORONTO, Canada (July 2, 2007) — A few words M. Sebastien Bourdais about your post race behaviour during the Champ Car race yesterday.

Mama called it a tantrum; Grandmama called it "acting out." In Formula One they call it “bringing the sport into disrepute” and drivers get hefty sanctions for shooting off their mouths at inappropriate times and in inappropriate words. Just ask one Jacques Villeneuve. In fact, perhaps, M. Bourdais, you should take a short jaunt from St. Jovite to Montreal and make that inquiry of M. Villeneuve himself. With another race coming up in three days’ time, it would be none too soon for him to put you in the picture.

A lot has already been said about the unprofessional behaviour of the French driver, three time Champ Car World Series Champion and Aspiring Formula One Driver Albeit At The Back Of The Grid, at the Grand Prix of Mont Tremblant over the weekend. But in case you spent Sunday in your boat at the cottage, here are the highlights. Bourdais jumped the start of the race and was given a bye. Later he misjudged a turn while under yellow flag conditions and took what the touring car people call a “lawn tour” and fell from the sharp end of the grid to 11th place. From there he stormed back to P2, but despite his best efforts he could not overcome Robert Doornbos (No. 4 Team Minardi USA) who went on to take the victory.

When interviewed on international television in Parc Ferme, instead of congratulating his fellow driver and admitting he was very lucky to dodge a couple of bullets and very good on the track to be able to rise above conditions and finish P2, he immediately launched into a tirade accusing the victor of having cheated him out of “his” win! A chorus of booing rose behind him from the French fans in the stands (how badly does a French driver have to behave to be booed by French Fans in a French venue?) yet Bourdais persevered. And not only that, but he carried his tantrum onto the podium, starting an argument with the race winner, refusing to shake his hand, and eliciting a renewed course of booing…and THEN he carried his brattish behaviour into the post-race press conference, continuing the same tirade of abuse, condescending put-downs and attempts to characterize as ‘blocking’ some moves that were obvious to Helen Keller to be an attempt to keep wet tires cool in the last three laps of a hotly contested race. A glance at the film post-race would reveal that every driver on the grid was seeking this same relief, not wishing to blow a tire and lose position in the dying minutes of an exciting and variable contest.

Here is just a sample of the Bourdais Tirade, taken from the post-race press conference transcript. First, the words of M. Bourdais.

“Just Robert passed me very cleanly on the track. Just left the door open. I was kind of hoping he was going to do the same when at some point I was a little quicker behind him. But that's not what he did. That's the only reason I was very unhappy with him. Still is, obviously,” said Bourdais. “But that's the way it is. Apparently his F1 experience is playing a little bit. He's not quite used to the way we should be behaving on the racetrack when you're not supposed to move, which he done on three occasions. Race control let it slip. That's fine. Anyway, he had the faster car. He seemed to do a great job. It's just a shame that as good a driver as he is, he had to do it this way. I think it would have been a much nicer win had he not done it.”

Got that? Bourdais blames (1) Doornbos for cheating; (2) Champ Car Race Control for allowing him to get away with it, and (3) Team Minardi for their ignorance of the Champ Car regulations, for the fact that Doornbos, and not he, came in first.

When asked for a response, Doornbos said this. “It's very easy. First of all, I'd like to thank Sebastien for all his compliments he made. He congratulates me.

“I mean, I fully think that I deserve this victory. I'm very happy for this team and for myself. But to see what happened on track, I know that the rules in the U.S. are different, a different way of racing. In Europe, we race hard. In Formula One, we race hard. It's a sport.

“At the end of the day, you're fighting -- you have to be selfish, you're fighting for your own positions. In the U.S. I have to respect the new rules. I paid the price last weekend in Cleveland where I felt that basically I made a mistake and the race director of Champ Car gave me a penalty, a drive-through, so my race was completely destroyed. With a bit of luck and good strategy, we got back on a good result.

“So I am for sure respecting the rules of racing in the U.S. In these conditions, though, you cannot predict what happens because, like everybody says, you're driving on slick tires in the wet, you're driving on wets tires on parts of the track which are dry. You're all over the place looking for grip.

“If Sebastien feels that he could have passed me, he should have done it. I felt I was quicker. “

Note that these are not personal recollections of what was said; they are a matter of public record.

Now, consider these two accounts, and notice that Doornbos did not respond to Bourdais’ slander against him, his team, and Race Control with equal vituperation, slander or ad hominem attacks. Instead, he pointed out some things that perhaps M. Bourdais did not want to consider: (1) Mr. Doornbos is in fact, not in fantasy, already an F1 driver; (2) Mr. Doornbos’ team knows the rules of the road and in fact were reminded in the race only a few days earlier that the rules on blocking are different here – and had to be aware that Race Control would be keeping an eye on him should he need a refresher course; and (3) that if Bourdais could have passed him without Doornbos simply slowing down and waving him by (no blue flags were involved), he certainly would have done so. Personally I also enjoyed the little Prost-like dig thanking Bourdais for the ‘compliments’. I equally appreciated the subtle tug on the hook of his review of the Cleveland race: Doornbos had been penalized (as Bourdais was not) for an early race violation, and like Bourdais did today he came back to stand on the podium – but Doornbos did not, as he did not point out but everyone can conclude for himself, use his air time in Parc Ferme to erupt in a tirade accusing everyone including Dan Clarke’s dog of conspiring to ruin his race.

There are times and places for exchanging opinions on your fellow drivers and their teams. I have a friend who races in sports cars who is adamantly opposed to a particular make of car, the team that runs them and all who dwell therein – but he makes his comments off the record, in places where no cameras are whirring or microphones are attuned, and not for publication. When he stands on the podium or in a press conference with members of this hated team and their suspect (to him) drivers, he is a gentleman and he gives them full points and props for their competitive race on the day. He will shake hands on the podium with a man he tried to flatten earlier in the weekend, in fact, and he has actually done so.

And even if a driver does make public comments about his fellow drivers, as our favourite Bad Boy, Paul Tracy, has been known to do (“I wonder why French guys try to pick fights with me but won’t take off their helmets?”) he gamely takes his lumps from the enraged fans and even converts them to his supporters without a single snivel, shriek or dying fit. Last year’s race in Montreal, of course, is Exhibit “A” where Tracy stood on the podium after a weekend of playing Wrestler Captain Quebec and wearing deelybobbers with the Quebec flag over his Forsythe cap, and was cheered to the echo by the fans for the way he played the game both on and off the track.

It’s called Sportsmanship, M. Bourdais. Sportsmanship, gentlemanly behaviour, and self-control are the hallmark of a champion.

I will close by offering M. Bourdais just a few words of advice and one, let us call it a heads up.

First, if you do get that drive with Toro Rosso, you will be lapped at least five times a race by Lewis Hamilton, who is 100 times the racer you are even in equal equipment. Should you jump out of your car and start accusing Hamilton and Team McLaren of the crimes, including not knowing the rules of Formula One, that you have heaped on Mr. Doornbos this weekend, you will not only be booed by a world wide audience instead of a regional one, but Lewis Hamilton will laugh at you and Formula One will suspend you, fine you and kick your tuchis.

Second, a man going to Formula One should study the epic battle of Senna v. Prost, and recognize the fact that Prost knew very well the way (as did Nelson Piquet in his battles with Nigel Mansell) to get under his competitor’s extremely thin skin was not to take him seriously in public. Prost drove at 95%, well within himself, and Senna drove at 110%, and Prost beat Senna as often as Senna beat Prost – and Prost was nonchalant about the fact and Senna hated that so much that he refused even to speak his hated rival’s name. In fact, you may wish to recall that when Senna, who was a much more noteable world champion than you are, made some of the same unfounded accusations about Prost and Race Control that you made this weekend, he came very close to losing his superlicense and trashing his career.

And finally, the heads up. Mr. Doornbos has been revealed In a Sports Illustrated article to be an accomplished kickboxer. Should you decide some day to poke him in the chest the way you did Paul Tracy, you may find yourself lying supine on the tarmac holding the gas can and wondering where the car has gone.

Just sayin’, Sebastien. Just sayin’.